I hate the feelings.

I dunno why. We don't feel like friends.
But nvm. even a normal friends also not.
Its ok. I hope everythings will be alright soon.
Friendship is just creating a good memories between each other,
and we've pass this too.
=D' ii truly thanks for everythings, But, EVERYTHINGS,
like our friendship is TOTALLY END,
so saddddd. T.T
lost you this friend, feel like lonely alreadyy.
Hope you've a great days in your coming life.
^PEACE. &. HAPPY^


--001--

Moody day =/

dunno why owh. today not really in mood. school was hot and no current =( so hate it. and somethings make me feel so worry. ii dunno how laaaaa~ HAIZ~ hm, but nvm. hope everythings just ii think too much. ii think its ok laaa~ hhehehehe=d muel muel <3 WE PAST A WONDERFUL SATURDAY=]

Today Is Nice <3

My Dearest Hubby <3
hehe. so miss you owh.
happy tuhh today can meet you.
ehhehee=) OUR LOVELY DATE.
the place.............DAMAI.=)
yeahhhhhh^^ happy. hehehehe=]
dunno how you think about lea, but for me, ii am quite quite happy.
the moment be with you so happpppppppppy =)
GREAT TIME<3
in that moment, ii really can feel our love so sweet & it was nice and beautiful =]



I.LOVE.YOU <3

-美丽的早上-

今天的我，很开心。或许是因为我和他，他渐渐地懂我对他的爱了吧。可是，唯一让我不开心的就是，他总是会对我隐瞒事实，好像有事，但又不能告诉我，我很难受，但是我愿意默默承担这一切。就算他再怎么对我，我都会无怨无悔，永远的付出一切我能给的。 =】 因为我很想他开心，所以，我会尽我的最好，真的，不管别人说我多傻也好，至少，我很百分百清楚自己要的，还有自己需要什么。所以，付出我也不后悔。我好爱他哦，我的MUELMUEL，真的很希望你会好好地珍惜我，可以吗？不要再像昨天一直骗我，隐瞒我，我会很不开心的，得空时，要CALL CALL我，让我放心，不想多多，以前的你，是我卢纪璇最爱的，你知道吗？因为，你最疼我，只要我要什么，你都会满足我，好想念以前的我们俩。很很很幸福 =） 所以，我希望未来的日子，都会那样幸福，或许能比以前更幸福，更美丽，对吧？ =】你要一直都记得我们之间的约定，好吗？只要，能像以前我就满意了，我真的不敢再期望什么，你当初因为我，改变了很多，很顺我，现在，虽然你不是完全像以前，不过，没有关系。我愿意从此包容你，我会让你回到以前的，像以前那样对我很好很好。 =】 好吗？

我想为你付出一点，但是我无能为力

今天，我也如常一样，过得很不开心，不知怎们了，到现在，依然不能承受分手的打击以及我和他各种不同的事情。我不知今天将会是我最后第几次写BLOG，因为我真的受不住太多太多的压力以及伤心，我知道他对我已经没有以前的感觉，但是，我依然想把他留在我身边。我真的很傻对吧？就算留得住他的人，留不住他的心那有用吗？我真的很坚持地想对他不放弃，可是，他放弃我了，他真的放弃我了，我以为我们的冷静时间会对我们之间有帮助，但是，我又一样做错了。我们之间不但闹得没有挽回的余地，反而更加的糟糕。看到你新的唯一靠在你怀里，我的眼泪真的为了你，都快滴干了，我们。。。真的就这样结束了？我真的很失败，我知道你已经找到她，然后已经想把我永远忘记，我觉得很抱歉，因为，我的打扰，让你心里很犹豫，不懂要不要再次相信我。以前的我们真的很像美丽的歌曲，但是我们现在却变成伤心的电影，一直深深的埋藏在我心底。其实我很清楚我自己，心里遇过最爱的人是你，但是，我一时间接受不到一切改变的太快，你的改变，让我有想往生的倾向，让我再也分不清自己做的东西。冲凉期间，我被剪刀深深的插了一小刀于我的小腿，是很痛，但是，却还比不过心里面一直压抑的痛。我原谅不了自己，也原谅不了你一样对我的谎言，你不告诉我真相，是因为你不想让我太伤心，我懂，但是，当我真的知道的时候，我想我真的很想跟阎罗王见面。从这份分手的感情，我学到了，再也不会珍惜自己的生命，真的想别人掠夺我的生命，因为，我宁愿永远关着眼睛，停止心跳，都不想看到你变成这个样子。你真的让我很难从心里把你抽离出来，我不想骗你，我真的很想闭着眼睛什么都见不到，听不到，永永远远失去我现在的知觉，变死人，永远不还生。我这个女人就是笨，太过于小气，又不懂体贴，一个人在家写着这个BLOG，让我很想很想舍得的丢下这一切，到一个另外世界。或许那是我的错，因为我拖拖拉拉，所以造成了很多问题。我很想跟你说最后一句话，我对不起你，希望你真的会想我，我会记得我们在一起的点点滴滴，但是我永远不放弃你。就算我会永远不在你身边，我的一切都属于你，灵魂永远在你身边，不离开。
请原谅我的无知，我的愚笨，这是因为在开始时有着太深的付出，所以，必须用最深的句点来结束是吗？？？

-完-

FIVE DAYS NO BLOG=(

hm, five days no post blog already. miss my bloggie life. cause at real life really so unhappy and feel so sad. I write my blog to chinese, someone say he cant really understand chinese, so ii choose to write english. I dunno why lu00~ why wan like that treat me.? the god like treating me unkind? dunno why, FRIEND like that, BF also like that. I really not angry la. Just feel my heart quite bu shuang lu0. I thought them are the person ii trust for much, but ii really wrong guessing, together backstab me, together misunderstanding me. I feel so sad laaaaaa. Call him remove Her at featured friend also so hard, say promise me not find her, say what is DADDY AND MUMMY relationship, dont say what la, ii also will misunderstanding ma ya owhh. you cannot remove to just tam me mehh? Promise me but still no do. Then you still got what condition to call me dont contact HIM? ii really dunno. even though ii really guai guai no contact? so what ii get, ii get an empty promises. This is what ii know.~ I feel so upset with the attitude and everythings. But, ii still keep it, suddenly ii really dunno why uu always feel her words THE RIGHT ONE? her words THE REAL ONE? her words THE GREAT ONE? why? can tell me? I need your answer,
ii just want you stand by myside, support me? uu know what you tell me? YOU SAID:'' cause she tell me ma''. Then she says what ii still can denied? NO? ii think.
I so JIAN CHI everydays, keep dont want forget you,
but you? ALL ALSO TRUST HER SAY.
and then keep say it was my wrongggggggggggggggggggg~
This is also why ii five days no updated my blog.
Because ii really dunno can say what.
CHANCE given by you,
ii try not too loud to you,
advice you dont like that,
but.... if you feel thats just awasting your time you can tell me directly,
then ii let you do what you want~
But, once you do what you want, ii will never look back actually,
because you also dont need me already. YA, maybe ii really too TIAN ZHEN, believe that you said you love me, only me, and what else. But, now? ii know what? ii know your heart got me de percentage is 0%.
You dont have the heart to stay me, You dont have the time to tam me,
You dont have the energy to believe me. Thats why. .. I cant confident on you too.
I really hope through this blog, you can read and understand what ii wanted to pass by.
I just hope you happy,
I give you 1weeks to remove her, but if you still don't, then ii also wont forbid you already.
and ii will definitely understand what am ii in your heart. Before you say de, what ii hug you warm la, what ii stay your side you happy. FAKE? REAL?
this is a mysterious answer for me........
NO MIRACLE~

Happy and Sad day. =) * =(

Haiz.Today can count as a SAD & HAPPY DAY. Early morning wake up then feel sad alreadyy, cry le a while of the morning things. although ii know ii am misunderstanding their relationship of each other. But ii really unlike he too good with another girl. Jealous gua? Dunno. ii hope ii wont do this kind of silly things again. I'm here by to say that ii am so sorry about that. But,I trying to put down, to let go, to be keeping as memories. I dont regret to have this relationship, because in the past of that, there was many beautiful stories between each other of us. =] heheeh~ =) Started to accept, started to have a new life without MUEL. =) hehe, but dont worry, ii will take care of my own, hope you t00 =] ii remember what you told me, and hope you hold true~

The Happy things was,
ii went upperstar for a drink and a relax. =)
happy to stay at the moment that could truly released my stress. =]
GREAT~ =]

Nvm,
ii LEARNT so much in this,
ii really BU SHE DE,
but, since ii already put down,
ii should accept the fact.
So, whats the adverse effect in it?
=)

*FOREVER PRINCESS*
Live in a peace, happy, funny, care world~
this is what ii want in my coming life~

Tears cannot pretenD =(

dunno why.suddenly feel no one understand my feelings. Ya, ii know, now you with 'HER' very best friend, until she replace my place in your heart! SHUT UP. i dont want to hear anythings, now is my turn to dont hear anythings~ I dunno why ii so mind about it. my heart feel so pain. One is my SISTER, and one is my X-BOYFRIEND. so what? she also the 2nd one in ur featured friend maaa. then better you go chase her as ur gf la. SHIT~ alright ii shouldn't mind too much` I always forget this. But today, you teach me HOW SHOULD II FORGET ABOUT YOU. wahh~ congratulation to you tw0 la. Dont forget her birthday also almost reach~ Then dont forget to HAVE a nice birthday with her. My birthday you din past with me, but nvm, then left it to past with her lu000~ ii really dunno why friend is like that, and a boyfriend also like that. better ii dont need a boyfriend.~
EVERY GUY SAY DE THINGS,
FIRSTLY MAKE ME HAPPY.
NOW?
MAKE ME .........



Love? is a slippery eel that bites like hell.




-------END--------because of your immature!

我很累，很想哭。。

今天，我选择用华语来完成我今天要表达的事情。
其实，我真的承认我是很乐观的人，但是，命运坎坷，让我的感情出现了很多很多的问题。 这些不是我想要的，但是却偏偏出现于我。我和MUEL认识，直到愚人节分手，我真的伤心了很久，因为我们在一起也有7个月多，然而他却傻傻地以为我一点都不紧张他。今天的我和MUELMUEL,就好像陌生人，感觉很陌生，完全没有以前的默契。。和他分手的原因，我想是因为我们之间的问题，我们之间的问题我也就不多说，一切的问题造成我们不再一起的结果。其实今天写这个部落格，我只是要很感谢一个人，那就是。。。。。。。。。陈国铭。他真的在我很需要陪伴的时候，让我度过了我最难过的时候，在我快要放弃自己，觉得没人会在意我，并且一个人寂寞的时候，我很感谢他一直都在我身边支持我，他是一个双鱼座的男人，他很了解我这个身为白羊座的女生，所以他真的很会安慰我的心灵。我真的很开心有他。除了,MUELMUEL,他应该可以算是第二个让我这么舒服的人。。
MUELMUEL, 说真的，我真的很舍不得一切与你度过的回忆。但是，一切已经成为回忆。我也很希望我们可以回到以前，但我始终认为我们彼此很需要时间来面对这一切。很感谢你成为我生命的一部分，你写了很美的回忆，在我心中。。。。一直永不磨灭，的记忆。

江若琳 - 手掌印

静显锋芒制作

要是我重头拣选下个　

明显都是错　情感可控制么

我习惯无人好好待我　

唯一伤害过　而且牺牲太多

我若试图忘记一种痛楚　

然而回忆迫使背负更多

宁愿你杀掉我　就当我上了一课　

做个好心分手彼此都不要拖

明明你根本称不上值得我的吻

别再忍　好应该摆脱伤心的厄运

而情感　怎么给踩过也不沉　

偏要酷爱着你这坏人

为何我即使给掌掴没有太不愤

随便笑　去讽刺我脸上的手掌印

原因　应该出於情难自禁　

总要是记着你这坏人的一吻

静显锋芒制作

这段感情无非伤得太多　

面上唯一手掌印在唱歌

提醒我你犯错　别再放纵你找我　

就当好心分开今天可干脆么

明明你根本称不上值得我的吻

别再忍　好应该摆脱伤心的厄运

而情感　怎么给踩过也不沉　

偏要酷爱着你这坏人

为何我即使给掌掴没有太不愤

随便笑　去讽刺我脸上的手掌印

原因　应该出於情难自禁　

总要是记着你这坏人的一吻

静显锋芒制作

总要是记着你这坏人的一吻

-降落伞，我的依赖，妥协-

。。降落伞。。
我闭上眼睛倒数五四三二一
纵身的跃进 浩瀚的未知
双脚悬着的畏惧也没关係
我吸一口气 展开双臂稳定自己下定了决心
爱情很美丽 我在远距离欣赏这幅风景
明知道将安全着陆目的 却在摇晃中我心神不宁
没有你我丧失信心 垂直掉下去我的爱就像是降落伞
只能义无反顾的飞翔 想念是狂风无法抵挡
速手无策的飘荡 我的爱就像是降落伞
勇敢的我在空中 绽放
请给我力量
空降你的身旁爱从天而降 守住这个地方



。。我的依赖。。
滴针的夜晚赶来做伴
重感冒的凌晨 煮着稀饭
这怪让我哭过的人多么温暖
我感谢我们不完美
却坦白自然
我们从牵手放手又牵手走过来
愿意为爱你去忙碌 spending on my life
每当情绪像海 你只抱我
从不催我讲出来
我就明白 你是我的依赖
滴针的夜晚赶来做伴
重感冒的凌晨 煮着稀饭
这个让我哭过的人多么温暖
我感谢我们不完美
却坦白自然
我们从期待失落又期待走过来
原以为一起看未来 spenlyd on my life
每当变成习惯 生活太淡
总有感动的意外
我就明白 你是我的依赖
就算受幸福都有老天在怪
直接不送我还是不肯还
用真爱说来
我们从日出日落又日出走过来
愿意为爱你去忙碌 spending on my life
每当命运变换 需要关怀
需要流泪你都在
我就明白 你是我的依赖
我们明白 爱是互相依赖




dunno why lea. first time hear that song. then feel quite niceeeee =] ngam my feeling gua. =] Just ii wanted to tell myself, dont be sad, be more tough and more happy. Life is A GREAT THING. =) Just ii hope now ii could enjoy it~ PEACE!!!!!!!!

I miss you =(

ii really so miss you. I don't want to break up, ii feel so SHE BU DE. ii know this 7months ii really make you changed a lots, ii also can feel that~ ii really dunno why, everytime ii talk with you ii really will cry, ii am so sorry about that, ii know ii not suppose to cry, but ii cant control myself, the tears automatically slowly drop down, ii wan cry loudly, but ii cant do that, ii scare my parents heard that. Honestly, ii really miss my past time with you, ii know it is very sweet and lovely, but, we end up with a word of UN-TRUST. so, this is the end of we two. I really cry le 3days of this things, ii dunno what happen. I really feel BENG KUI. but, ii really have to be tough. . . . . . Everythings between we two, ii will took it as a GREAT MEMORIES. really~ I really have to thanks you not smoke, not out for drink, not be flowerheart, be a brand new you. But, very KE XI, you met with the wrong girl, that will hurt you, SO SORRY. I really feel that ii cant put down you even if a minutes, maybe you create too much memories in my heart, and SOMETHING BETWEEN US, OUR SECRET. *5220* II NEVER FORGET! heart so pain when drop this BLOG. But, here is my way to express out my suffer in heart~ I dont want talk, but ii wanted to share. I'm so sorry ii hurt you so much, ii dont understand you, ii really feel ii stupid for doing these kind of things. But, this is a fact ii couldn't change. When you asked me isn't that ii regret with my answer, ii still CHENG QIANG, say NO. But that time, ii know ii really wanted to be with you. Just hope ii can;t give you de happiness, will be another better than me de girl give you. I want you try a new relationship, mayb you will feel that your heart more comfortable. The girl maybe could give you what ii couldn't give and do for you. WISH YOU. . . . . . . .. . .

I really feel happy with Our memories, at spot pub the first time we meet to celebrated your birthday, A romance kiss at stairs. A date in coffee bean. A LOve created in A days. Going birthday party on 31/08/2008. Go Labuan at 20.21/09/2008. Hang out to sutera harbour, center, citymall, warisan, 1borneo. 08.11.2008 dye the same hair colour and we went to BEACH in a first time. 01.12.2008 is our 100days together. 23.12 go CHURCH TOGETHER celebrated christmas coming~ 24.12.2008 we go FUNFAIR, and it was OUR 4th month anniversary till 3am just back home~ =) 01.01.2009 we went PULAU MANUKAN with my families. 24.01.2009 we went to CHINESE NEW YEAR DE PASAR MALAM. =) 14.02.2009 my sweet valentine with You in FISH & CO with roses. My birthday ii get a wonderful birthday with YOU, family & friends. =) II appreciated all here. I thanks and ii love you. =)

THIS seven months eleventh-days, ii really LOVEYOU. ii put much time and effort on you , ii know & ii do.


I just hope, If you can read this blog, ii hope that.......... in you heart, YOU REALLY WONT FORGET ME AND 24.08.2008 =/ my only wish. And the person who LOVE YOU for days, XUANXUAN**


The Last words, Thanks For everythings. I HAPPY TO LOVE YOU BEFORE*


我想我是太过依赖
在挂电话的刚才
坚持学单纯的小孩
静静看守这份爱
知道不能太依赖
怕你会把我宠坏
你的香味一直徘徊
我舍不得离开